“To His Mistress Going to Bed” by John Donne (posthumous 1633)

This Donne poem is a far more conventional and far more straightforward version of the dynamic between lovers explored in “Break of Day”: specifically, the dynamic of one lover eager to make love, the other not so much. In this, the man is the pursuer, not the woman, and his request to his lover to have sex now is so clear Donne feared publishing this. Like “Break of Day,” one lover lays out the case for why they should have sex, but in this case the one doing the arguing is the man to a woman, more in line with cultural gender expectations, reluctant to concede to the request.

“To His Coy Mistress” by Andrew Marvell (posthumous 1681)

One of Donne’s peers, another Elizabethan poet defined later as a Metaphysical poet, Marvell presents his own version of a lover frustrated by his lover’s refusal to engage in sex. The argument is artful and elaborate—if we lived forever, if we had time enough, this coaxing game you are insisting on playing would be cute and even erotic. But we do not have the time. Again, the dynamic is the traditional one Donne’s era (and perhaps still our own) is more comfortable with: The man pursues the woman.