Marin Machado is the main character of the novel. The third-person narration inhabits her consciousness throughout the majority of Parts 1, 3, and 4. Marin is married to Derek Machado, with whom she has a four-year-old son, Sebastian. Marin’s life is idyllic, as she and Derek have been happily married for years. They both run successful businesses, love their son, and live in a sprawling mansion in Seattle, Washington’s wealthy Capitol Hill neighborhood. Everything changes for Marin, however, when Sebastian disappears at the Pike Place Market one afternoon while in her care. Marin soon spirals into depression and is hospitalized when she attempts suicide. She blames herself for Sebastian’s death and struggles to embrace healing.

After her release from psychiatric care, she starts attending a support group and begins seeing a therapist. She has “moments when she doesn’t feel like she’s dangling by a rapidly unraveling thread,” but her healing remains a slow and trying process (16). This is in large part because Marin is afraid of moving beyond Sebastian’s disappearance. If she lets herself live “a productive life despite what happened,” she fears that she will lose Sebastian forever (20). Therefore, Marin doesn’t always invest in her grieving and healing process.