This section includes Chapter 1: Pages 1-20, Chapter 2: Pages 20-34, and Chapter 3, Pages 34-51

As the new school year approaches, Greg Heffley writes in his new journal. His older brother Rodrick punches him and calls him a sissy for writing in a book that says “diary” on it. Greg recalls how he spent his summer: His family didn’t travel or do anything Greg thinks is fun because Greg’s father forced him to join the swim team. Greg endured a crowded swimming pool, a cold locker room, and several trips in Rodrick’s dilapidated van over the summer. Eventually, Greg learned that he could hide in the boys’ bathroom during swim practice.

On the first day of school, Greg is reminded that he still has the Cheese Touch from last year. Fortunately, Greg is able to pass the Cheese Touch to a new student who doesn’t know about the tradition by greeting him with a back slap. As Greg reports to his new classes, he remembers how he used to tease a student named Peter Uteger because his initials were “P.U.” Greg admits that although he feels kind of bad about that, he thinks, “it’s hard not to take credit whenever it comes up” (12).