“In love we find out who we want to be; in war we find out who we are.” 

The first sentence of The Nightingale touches on several interrelated themes, including love, trauma, and the choices people make in order to survive. The idea that love reveals “who we want to be” is closely related to the idea that love redeems, which plays a large role in the novel—most notably when Julien Rossignol sacrifices his life for his daughter, making amends for his past cruelty and neglect. The second half of the statement suggests that war functions as a kind of test of character, with the decisions people make under pressure revealing their true priorities. This proves particularly true for Vianne, whose experiences during WWII teach her that she is braver and more resilient than she’d previously suspected, while also revealing a side of herself she would probably have preferred to ignore (e.g., that she is capable of killing). With all that said, the story that follows also complicates the cut-and-dry distinction Vianne draws here, with love, for instance, often revealing people’s fragility rather than simply their aspirations.

“If I had told him the truth long ago, or had danced and drunk and sung more, maybe he would have seen me instead of a dependable, ordinary mother. He loves a version of me that is incomplete.”

Vianne is a devoted mother, and her inability to protect Sophie from the horrors of war is a constant source of pain to her throughout the German occupation.